By Dr Neethu Mariam Chacko, MD
Specialist Psychiatrist, FSHN Clinic
Special to The Times Kuwait
“Just get up and do something. You will feel better.”
For someone living with depression, such words may sound familiar. Although often well-intentioned, they can leave the person feeling misunderstood. Getting out of bed, taking a shower or answering a phone call may already require enormous effort. What appears to be laziness may actually be a struggle to get through the day.
World Mental Health Day, observed every year on October 10, encourages greater awareness of mental well-being and the support people need. This year’s theme, “Lived Experiences Heard: Real Voices, Real Change,” highlights an important question: are we truly listening to people who have experienced mental health difficulties?
Lived experience refers to what people learn by going through mental health challenges themselves, from recognising symptoms and seeking help to receiving treatment and returning to everyday life. It also includes how others respond to them, whether their concerns are heard or dismissed, and what support makes a difference.
Medical knowledge can explain depression, anxiety and psychosis, but it cannot fully capture how these conditions affect each individual. Depression may bring exhaustion, loss of interest and difficulty concentrating. Anxiety can make it difficult to quiet persistent worries, while psychosis may involve frightening experiences, including hearing voices others cannot hear.
Experiences vary, even among people with the same diagnosis. One person may fear losing a job, while another struggles with family responsibilities or worries about how relatives will react. Understanding these differences requires listening rather than making assumptions based on a diagnosis.
People experiencing mental health difficulties are still frequently met with comments such as “You are thinking too much,” “Everyone has problems” or “You have so much to be grateful for.” Such remarks, even when well meant, can make people feel guilty about their condition and discourage them from speaking openly.
Fear of judgement can prevent students from telling their parents they are struggling, employees from seeking help at work and parents from admitting they are finding daily responsibilities difficult. When people anticipate criticism or rejection, reaching out for support becomes harder.
Listening does not mean having all the answers. It means allowing someone to speak without interrupting, comparing their experience with our own or immediately offering advice. Simple questions such as “What has been difficult for you?” and “How can I help?” can open a meaningful conversation. It is equally important to respect people who need time or are not ready to share everything.
Lived experiences also have an important role in improving mental healthcare. People who have sought treatment can identify what helped them and what made the process more difficult. A healthcare professional who explains treatment patiently or a family member who offers support can make a difference. Conversely, feeling ignored during a consultation or struggling to access care can add to an already difficult experience.
Patients should have opportunities to ask questions, discuss treatment options and explain their concerns. Care plans are more useful when they consider a person’s daily circumstances, including employment, family responsibilities and available support. Understanding what matters to each individual is essential to providing appropriate care.
Families and communities can also help by checking on people who have become withdrawn, avoiding jokes or dismissive remarks about mental illness, and encouraging professional help when needed. Practical assistance, such as helping arrange an appointment or accompanying someone if they wish, can make seeking care less daunting.
Support should continue beyond the first conversation or appointment. Recovery can take time, and difficult days may follow periods of improvement. A setback does not necessarily mean someone is not trying. Patience, understanding and asking what kind of support is helpful can make a meaningful difference.
Above all, people should be recognised as more than their illness. They have relationships, responsibilities, talents and aspirations. Recovery may mean returning to work, sleeping better, meeting friends or enjoying time with family. These everyday achievements matter and should be part of conversations about progress.
This World Mental Health Day, the focus should extend beyond awareness messages to how we respond when someone tells us they are struggling. Do we make time to listen? Do we take their concerns seriously? Do we include them in decisions about their care?
Listening cannot replace professional treatment or accessible mental health services, but it can help people feel less alone and encourage them to seek support. By listening to lived experiences and acting on what we learn, families, communities and healthcare providers can help make mental health care more respectful and effective.
Real voices can lead to real change when we are willing to listen, learn and act.
