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Women tend to avoid hard conversations
August 6, 2017, 2:52 pm

Do you get a knot in your stomach just thinking about addressing weight gain with your significant other and being honest without being too mean? It is not your fault. Hard conversations are not fun, but talking about tough stuff in a genuine and meaningful way is very important.

Staying quiet isn’t healthy: Speaking up can be really tough to do, but finding the strength to communicate is very important for handling conflict in a healthy way. Avoiding hard conversations leads women to swallow their feelings, which is very unhealthy. Resentments women fail to address turn into blame or anger, or they manifest in different ways, like a stressrelated illness. If you avoid hard conversations, you hide from the people you are at odds with, and that doesn’t solve anything. When you are acting from fight or flight mode, you get stuck in a state of reacting to what is happening rather than responding from self-awareness and integrity. In every sense of the word, people have forgotten how to act like an adult.

The power of hard conversations comes from women connecting with their partners or families or friends in meaningful ways, like sharing their thoughts, opinions, and voice. This is how women start working together to create new solutions. Women have a particularly tough time broaching sensitive subjects or speaking up. Here are the reasons:

Women care too much: Feel like you naturally put your relationships above everything else? You’re not alone. Women are natural caretakers and peacemakers. They have been trained to be nice, and many of them are afraid of being seen as bitchy. Unfortunately, many haven’t been taught to own their thoughts and feelings, so they think they will negatively impact their connections with others. Having a hard conversation doesn’t mean a relationship need to end. It is a total myth that sharing your truth will result in something awful, like the other person shutting down or walking away. Instead, addressing conflict with a BFF or partner can actually help us open up and build a stronger connection. These are strengths that all women have and can choose to enhance.

Women don’t like conflict: These days, you can block or unfriend someone you disagree with over social media, instead of hearing them out and offering your feedback in a neutral and compassionate way. Cutting someone out because they disagree with your point of view or directly confront your over certain issues does a disservice to your friendship or relationship. Women should be willing to listen and understand other points of view in the interest of broadening their own knowledge, and showing themselves to be open minded. 

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