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Things every smart, single man is looking for in a woman
May 24, 2013, 10:53 am


It is unlikely that any of us can recognize real, lasting love the first time we meet somebody, but there a few things that help a man decide if a first meeting needs to turn into a first date.

Assume your awesomeness:  Though it can be difficult, assume you are an awesome, quality person. This is not about having a big ego. It is about not feeling insecure, not laughing too often and too long at what is not funny enough and not agreeing too fast and repeatedly before any actual points or ideas are fully expressed. If you take your awesomeness as a given, you can focus on finding out what is awesome about the guy you just met. This will ensure you remain genuine, and the conversation will end up the same way.

Skip the sharp-edged wit: Every online profile, every random dater, every TV single person all say they want the same thing in a mate: a sense of humor. From men and women. But the pressure to be funny, when mixed with a healthy dose of nerves, means that conversations easily veer into banter. But banter often flips directly into sarcasm and making jokes at your date's expense. Men appreciate women who are able to laugh without feeling the need to be constantly funny.

Arrive mentally unaccompanied:  Many people have the habit of mentally inviting along some of their friends, who take a seat on the discussion panel in their heads. These are friends who would disqualify a woman for the way she dressed or laughed or for her job. The fact she was a vegetarian and other ridiculous criteria. Meeting somebody is not like a reality talent show, ditch this absurd panel of judges.

Try to hear the candle burning:  Many men struggle to truly focus when a woman is speaking and often their brains shuffle over other thoughts. This applies to women as well. If you take a moment to focus, you will be able to hear the candle burning.  Clear your mind and let it be refilled by the words of the person you are speaking with. When you are able to react to what your date is saying, the romantic tension  is driven upwards.

Tell me exactly what I want to hear: Men love to hear from a woman about anything that she is passionate about. Her job, her art, her hobby, her rescue dog or her family. Women who know what they want in life, women who are actively trying to get it — there is nothing more engaging than that, because nothing sounds more enticing coming out of a woman's mouth than something she feels passionate about. And if she is insanely passionate about what she does, then it is easy to understand each other.

If she is driven, she is going to inspire the prospective partner, and finding a woman with the ability to inspire is exactly what most smart, single men are looking for.


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